Education Vomitation

Like so many Americans, I recently had the flu. While I was sick, I noticed that after I threw up, I felt much better.  Now recovered, I’ve been reflecting on how the experience of vomiting relates to public education. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with our education system that a little purging couldn’t cure. What exactly do we need to clean out?

Isn't it time to purge our education system?
Isn’t it time to purge our education system?

Mostly we need to rid ourselves of “rotten” educators who have been festering in the bowels of our schools. You know who they are; they know who they are. Some of them write for this website. They are those teachers who point to a child’s poverty as an excuse for poor academic performance. Those who expect to work contractual hours or who demand a duty-free lunch. They are the teachers who have been proven valueless by a fair evaluation system a.k.a. a series of student standardized test scores. We need to rid the system of the so-called educators who would rather whine about teaching the whole child than implement the soon-to-be-proven effective common core standards.  And just like when you have the flu, as soon as we’ve cleaned out our system, we’ll all feel much better.

In my opinion, the best thing America could do is flip the education system on its head and lean it over a toilet.


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